Lists. Her life is stitched together by lists. Lists on refrigerator, a list in the bottom of her bag that tells her what should be in it before she leaves anywhere. A list by her door reminding her of everything she needs to do before she leaves the house. It's not because she's forgetful, she tells herself. It's just that her mind is a battlefield. Never quiet, a thousand thoughts zooming in and out of her brain at once. Some days it's not as loud but there are others where she feels as if she's stuck in a room listening on on two different whispered conversations and four television sets all set tuned into different channels. When she walks into her house, her keys can't leave her hand until they're put in their proper place. If not, she might find them a week later stuffed inside her underwear drawer. Or they could end up being lost forever. She never really knows.
Regrets. 27 years and she is convinced she has more regrets than anyone else her age. Most come from things that she has said. Things she knew she shouldn't have said at the time.